ABOUT ME

When I got pregnant with my first child in 2012 I was working in an office of a large international NGO in Amsterdam. I worked really hard, I loved my job and I had wonderful colleagues.

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While the baby was growing inside of me, it dawned upon me that my life was about to change radically. Everyone around me gave me (unsolicited) advice about pregnancy, birth and motherhood. And while I was listening to their often contradicting advice, reading book after book, I did not realize how much I was living in my head. I had it all planned out but I was not really connected to my body. Deep inside, I was scared and anxious of the birth and motherhood. Can I give birth? Am I cut out to be a mom? But instead of exploring and allowing these feelings to be there, I brushed them off and pushed them aside.

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After my daughter was born, I struggled to grow into my mother role. I did not feel the motherly intuition everybody talked about. How could I listen to my maternal instinct if I didn’t feel it? In my life before kids, I had kept up the appearance of a proud perfectionist. But inside, I was very harsh to myself. Subconsciously I was afraid that somebody would see the real me, with all my imperfections and vulnerabilities.

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By becoming a mother this feeling was amplified. I could not hide anymore. I felt pressure to excel at being a mom and I became even more critical of my own capabilities. I found myself becoming the worried, stressed, and impatient mother I had desperately hoped to avoid becoming. I suffered from anxiety, restlessness and physical symptoms such as headaches and muscle tension.

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The Power of Touch

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After years of talk therapy I finally I discovered the power of touch. It was a total different approach to what I had tried previously. I was skeptical and scared; but to my surprise the pressure and tension that had built up in my body slowly started to soften. It was as if the ice was melting around me and I could finally connect to my core.

 

“If You Always Do What You’ve Always Done, You’ll Always Get What You’ve Always Got.” Henry Ford

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A whole new world opened up to me. I discovered that our emotions are stored in the body, waiting to be felt, to come out, if we let them. I always used to (over)analyze and rationalize my problems. But when I felt connected to my body, I could really connect to my feelings. I realized that we feel emotions, we don’t think emotions.

 

Body Awareness

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Through somatic therapy I learned to explore and honor my experiences and sensations. I became more aware of my body. I learned how to listen to what it wanted to tell me. When I am connected to my body, I am connected to myself and to the world around me. I feel more confident and more resilient. I now know how to navigate my own nervous system and can deal much better with all the small and big challenges that are part of life - and motherhood.

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From Passion to Profession

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Fascinated by this profound experience, I immersed myself into the world of emotions and the body/mind connection. I completed the 4 year-program at the Akademie voor Massage en Beweging in Amsterdam to become a licensed massage therapist. This post-HBO study equipped me with the skills and tools to work with the body in a therapeutic setting. I graduated on the topic of shame, exploring its emotional and biological dimensions. Through personal experience, I've witnessed how shame manifests physically, causing tension, pain, and disconnection. Somatic therapy, I've found, offers a path to reconnecting with oneself and healing from shame.

 

I am also a certified birth doula, supporting women and couples individually. For the past few years, I have also been co-hosting Centering Pregnancy sessions, together with the midwives at AmsterMam and teaching different childbirth education classes to expecting couples.

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Curious how we can better prepare our bodies to give birth, I delved into the physiology of the birthing body, exploring how positioning and movement can impact the ease and efficiency of labor. As a Certified Spinning Babies Parent Educator I offer valuable insights into optimizing the birthing experience for both mother and baby.

 

At the heart of my practice is the sincere desire to help you listen to and comprehend the language of your body. When your body feels acknowledged and seen, it no longer needs to shout for help or go on strike. Your body deserves your attention and tender loving care, especially as you are about to embark on this transformative journey of motherhood.

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My clients value my calm, empathic and caring presence. I genuinely wish for everyone that they feel more connected to themselves.

 

Originally from Germany, I have been calling Amsterdam my home since 2002. Now living with my husband and two kids (2013 and 2016) in beautiful Amsterdam Noord.